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    Wednesday, July 23rd, 2008
    hascheezburger 10:00a
    Cubicle kitteh


    cat

    Cubicle kitteh spies on you at work

    spyware. u haz it.

    picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: Severusgnypig

    » Recaption This

    hascheezburger 12:00a
    brisingamen
    10:35a
    Planning ...
    This evening I shall be at the BSFA meeting, as PK is interviewing Chris Priest, something I'm very much looking forward to.

    However, this afternoon I think I shall go to Tate Britain to see The Lure of the East: British Orientalist Painting, for obvious reasons. This of course presupposes I a) finish the editorial report I'm writing, b) get the kitchen tidied up, and c) finish off a couple of other small jobs that need doing today.

    We shall see.

    Meanwhile, working through my to-do list for dealing with non-sf scholarly organisations, I've managed to sort out joining n-sfsos #3 and #4 in a very satisfactory manner. Next to deal with #2 on my list. I didn't mean to tackle them in reverse order, so to speak, but it seems to be working quite well. It's all faintly unnerving too, in that I'm effectively putting down markers for where I want to be in the next few years, and that's very scary. But also exciting.

    Slightly smaller but otherwise healthy chimney seagull chick has this morning slipped off the chimney pot ( frightened by a pair of jackdaws, I think, but it happened while my back was turned) but is standing on the ridge below the chimney, and seems alright. Parents seem to know it's there, and I am hoping I am not condemned to watching it die a slow death from lack of food. I am worried sick about it as it clearly wants to be back with its sibling. I hate nature at times like this.

    In other news, Minnow is using the manuscript I've been reading as a pillow. She looks tooth-rottingly cute. However, this is not helping the seagull!
    premiership
    [ duj_1arm ]
    9:28a
    Huckerby = legend
    New San Jose Earthquakes signing Darren Huckerby's dinner might have been with the dog when he returned from an interview on American TV.

    When asked: "Do you have a famous girlfriend - anybody we can help promote?" The former Norwich and Coventry striker replied: "I am married but is a bit late for her - she is too old."
    (Daily Mail)
    thearseblog 7:04a
    A dull draw, Kolo has Malaria + news round-up

    Pre-season continued last night with a 1-1 draw against Hungarian side Szdyrgcbcbrtrvl Dlllbfyrtf with Theo Walcott scoring the Arsenal goal (goal and highlights via Arsenalist).

    There really isn't any point in analysing these games too seriously. They're about getting some match fitness into the players, at this stage performances don't really matter too much. I didn't see any of it myself but we had Carlos Vela make his first appearance in an Arsenal shirt and new signing Francis Cocklesandmussels apparently did quite well.

    There now comes a period when the players are going to be put through their paces and a lot of fitness work will take place in the build up to the next game against Cheeseburgerland next Monday. Pat Rice explains the idea behind the Austrian training camp and you can see some pictures here.

    Afterwards Arsene Wenger spoke about our midfield, saying:

    We need one more body in there. If we find a reasonable target we will get him. There is no special name.

    This is after saying new boy Aaron Ramsey faces a lot of competition to earn a place in the first XI so it'll be interesting to see who he brings in. Everyone knows the names that have been bandied around for the last couple of weeks, it'd typical of Arsene to sign someone nobody expects. A bit like the Eduardo signing last summer - and speaking of the Crozilian he's due back in 'three to four' weeks according to the boss. Whether that's just to training or if it means he's back and pushing for a place in the team remains to be seen.

    There was some bad news from the training camp as well as Kolo Toure reportedly has malaria. He's in good spirits, apparently, but it can be a debilitating illness. However, I'm not sure it's thrown our pre-season into 'crisis' as some reports suggest.

    Thierry Henry spoke yesterday about Arsenal. Interviewed during Barcelona's tour of Scotland he was asked about Adebayor and again you'd be wise to ignore the reports saying 'Henry opens the door for Adebayor at Barcelona'. He was very obviously non-committal when asked a leading question by a journalist. He merely said it's natural that when you have a good season big clubs look at you. He knows fine well that the journos were looking for something a bit juicy so they could run the 'Come join me at Barcelona' headlines. I mean, he even had some nice things to say about Alex Hleb, that's how media savvy he is.

    Beyond that he had some very nice thing to say about Arsenal and he believes we can win something in the season ahead. I hope he's right. BBC video link here.

    Samir Nasri is excited about joining Arsenal and says that Arsene Wenger's presence at the club was a major draw for him. He says:

    He represents stability and continuity. We understand we can work on the long term with him. I think he’s been at Arsenal for 13 years. It means the world! I have joined an immense club where there’s everything to achieve great things. I’m delighted to be part of this new adventure.

    He may have his maths wrong regarding the boss but it's good to know that former players, even ones who left under a cloud like Dolphin-headed cunt, have positive things to say about the club. We should get our first look at Nasri during next week's friendlies.

    So there you go. To those websites complaining about a 1-1 pre-season draw, grow the fuck up you sad cunts.

    Till tomorrow.

    snopes_dot_com 3:00p
    The Natural
    Does John McCain not qualify as a natural-born citizen of the U.S. because he was born in Panama?
    brisingamen
    7:01a
    A poem ...
    I haven't given you a poem recently, so have a poem ...
    behind the cut )
    apod 4:58a
    Happy People Dancing on Planet Earth

    What are these humans doing?  What are these humans doing?


    hnpcc
    2:39p
    Last things meme
    Because I haven't memed for a while:
    It's a weird subset of last things )
    Tuesday, July 22nd, 2008
    hascheezburger 10:00p
    googlemobileblg 3:33p
    Mobile Tricks with the Google Mobile App
    It turns out we're not the only ones excited about the new Google Mobile App for iPhone and iPod Touch. Adam Pash, of the productivity blog Lifehacker, shows off how he uses the Google Mobile App.





    Our friends at Blendtec got a new 3G iPhone and loaded it up with the Google Mobile App... and you can guess what happened next.


    Keep your submissions coming! Remember, they should have the Mobile Tricks slides at the beginning and end of the clip, so we can feature them on our Mobile Tricks YouTube channel.

    Posted by Effie Seiberg, Mobile Trickster
    ljgenie
    [ fub ]
    10:32p
    English-language online maps of Japan?
    Dear LJ Genie, who can read any script,

    We're currently planning our trip to Japan. We'd like to look at a location just to see where it is relative to our hotel, etcetera. But unfortunately, the maps on Google Maps and on Live Search Maps all use kanji, and Yahoo Maps doesn't have maps of Japan in any appreciable detail.

    Does the LJ Genie know of any other online maps, that have city, quarter and street names in romanji?

    Current Mood: curious
    hascheezburger 7:00p
    Monorail Cat Rush Hour Service


    cat

    Monorail Cat Rush Hour Service Adds Extra Cars

    maek sur u dont git stuk in a monorail car pileup.

    picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption:

    » Recaption This

    bbcquirkies 6:51p
    Opera house targets Sun readers
    Tickets for the opening night of the new Royal Opera House season will only be available to readers of the Sun newspaper, it is announced.
    bbcquirkies 4:54p
    Nigerian Muslims hail meat which spells Allah
    Thousands flock to restaurant in northern Nigeria where meat bearing the word "Allah" is found.
    hascheezburger 4:00p
    dilbert_blog 1:00a
    Progress Bars
    I always appreciate progress bars that tell me my software is hard at work on my behalf. Any time I have to wait without a progress bar it makes me feel anxious. If I'm expected to be bored and unproductive for a minute or two, I want reassurances that something good is happening behind the scenes.

    The other day I was wondering if there could be a better kind of progress bar than the usual ones I always see. Could the progress bar simultaneously assure you it is working, give you a time estimate for completion, and also entertain you in some minimal way?

    Naturally my first thought went to Dilbert characters, properly licensed of course. Imagine a progress bar that involved Dogbert using a mallet to pound the Pointy-Haired Boss into the ground; the deeper he goes, the less time left to wait.

    Or imagine Dilbert giving you a non-stop series of compliments corresponding to each level of completion, such as "You look nice today," and "I think you are smarter than your co-workers." The compliments would be shallow and random, but I'll bet it would hold your attention. The same model could be used with Dogbert as a fortune teller, giving you fake predictions that do nothing but make you feel good, e.g. "Today is your lucky day."

    Or imagine a standard progress bar that goes from left to right, but a Dilbert character puts on a cowboy hat, straddles the bar like a horse, and kicks it jockey style any time it slows down. That would make me happy because I get angry at the progress bar when it stalls. I'd like to see it get kicked.

    I would also happily read famous quotes or answer trivia questions streamed to me from some external source. It would add a tiny delay, but the payoff would be worth it. A minute of entertainment is better than 58 seconds of boredom even if you are in a hurry.

    Perhaps a Dilbert comic could be the progress bar. It reveals itself from left to right as the job is being completed. The humor wouldn't work because the timing would be ruined, but it would hold your attention just to see how it ends.

    Suppose you could choose your mood before any action that requires a progress bar, and the progress bar would be based on that choice. If you say you are in an angry mood, you might see Dogbert pummeling someone while you wait. If you are in a relaxed mood, maybe Ratbert suns himself and stretches, just looking cute and goofy.

    Got any ideas for progress bars? (Yes, someone might steal your idea and make a fortune. But realistically, were you going to pursue it?)

    hascheezburger 1:00p
    natureclimate 9:15a
    Slap on the wrist for 'Swindle'
    A ruling came in yesterday on complaints about the UK documentary The Great Global Warming Swindle. On The Great Beyond, Katharine Sanderson notes that despite very negative headlines about the ruling, you might say that Channel 4 got off pretty...
    hascheezburger 10:00a
    bbc_tms_blog 9:07a
    BBC ready for Twenty20 bonanza

    Well after a highly eventful four days in Leeds, the BBC cricket team moves back into Twenty20 mode for the climax to this season's domestic Twenty20 competition.

    And with the potential pot of gold that could come with qualification for the lucrative Champions League, this is a really important few days for five county sides. I say five, because of course there is some unfinished business before finals day.

    One of the few positives to come out of England's four-day demise at Headingley is that we are able to bring full commentary on Five Live Sports Extra of Tuesday evening's much-delayed Twenty20 quarter-final at Chester-le-Street.

    It's been a strange few days for Durham. They were originally due to play Yorkshire until that game was controversially postponed at the last moment following an argument over the registration of a Yorkshire player. Then it looked like Nottinghamshire would be Durham's opponents, until an appeal led to Glamorgan being surprisingly given a quarter-final place instead.

    The match will be a great opportunity for Paul Collingwood and Steve Harmison to remind the selectors of what they can do, and they will be joined in the Durham side by former South Africa captain Shaun Pollock - fresh from the TMS commentary box. Even if the Test match had gone into a fifth day, we'd agreed to let Shaun go and play in the fixture.

    To be honest I am not sure there are many other members of the TMS team who could play in a major fixture 24 hours after a Test commentary. But I do have to report that although Shaun may be in great shape, he has not been able to resist the odd slice of cake which has kindly been sent to us over the past couple of weeks.

    Whilst Pollock is moving from the commentary box to the playing field, Australian bowler Jason Gillespie is going the other way for Tuesday's match. Glamorgan have decided to leave out their Ashes bowler for the fixture, but we are delighted that he will be joining us on Five Live Sports Extra instead. Gillespie will be joined in the commentary box by England and Lancashire batsman Mal Loye, one of the country's top one-day batsmen and master of the slog sweep off any kind of bowler.

    Coverage starts Tuesday evening at 1715 BST on Five Live Sports Extra.

    The mascot race at a previous Twenty20 Finals DayThen whatever you do, don't miss our commentary on Twenty20 Finals Day live from the Rose Bowl on Saturday. If you've heard our coverage before, you will know that our commentary on this special day is a little different.

    We have broadcasters not only in the commentary box, but also out on the boundary edges and in the players' dug-out as we bring you our unique '3D style' coverage. It will be dynamic, dramatic and at times dangerous as the ball lands inches from our brave boundary reporters, especially if the likes of new Twenty20 star Graham Napier get going.

    Coverage starts on Five Live Sports Extra at 1115 for the first semi-final between Essex and Kent - shortly before that, listen out for first news of the squad for the third Test. Will Darren Pattinson keep his place or are the likes of Harmison and Matthew Hoggard on for a recall?

    Middlesex play either Durham or Glamorgan in the second semi-final before commentary moves to Five Live for the final from 1900 BST.

    Before that, from 1800 BST on Five Live you will be able to take part in a special Cricket 606 with Mark Chapman and Phil Tufnell.

    Tuffers will be with us throughout the day as part of a commentary team which also includes Mark Pougatch, Arlo White, Alison Mitchell, Kevin Howells and Simon Hughes plus Essex and England fast bowler Alex Tudor and England spinner Graeme Swann.

    And make sure you are listening throughout the day, because as well as all the cricket action don't miss our now legendary commentary on the mascots race, this year with a very special twist!

    bbcquirkies 8:07a
    Rock drummers 'are top athletes'
    Playing the drums for a rock band requires the stamina of a Premiership footballer, research suggests.
    brisingamen
    9:48a
    As others see us ...
    Somehow, I had failed to notice that the Lambeth Conference is mostly happening at UKC, so maybe it's as well I can't use the library at present as I presume I would find it hard to park my car, and I'm not sure I would mix well with the more ... shall we say traditional elements of the worldwide Anglican communion, at any rate, those who have turned up.

    I am, though, fascinated by the coverage of UKC itself in the Guardian. It talks about the 'vast' campus, for example ... it's true that the grounds in which the campus (i.e. buildings) is set are indeed enormous, but for the most part I've always thought it to be a reasonably compact campus. From this I infer that they are billeting the clergy in the halls of residence down at Parkwood, which is something of a trek from the centre of the action, say ten minutes.

    There is a little bit of fun at the expense of the campus night-time escort service for those who feel vulnerable walking around after dark; which is not funny as, frankly, walking around after dark on campus is something I do find very unnerving as it is not well lit, and there is a lot of shrubbery. You should, for example, see the footpaths to Parkwood, and the overspill car park is further out even than that, nearer a fifteen-minute walk from the centre of campus, which is why I try never to use it (though as they've now built a graduate college on the bulk of the main car park, this may have to change).

    And there is the shock, horror revelation by the Grauniad that 'the Lambeth accommodation is for singles only, leaving bishops and wives sleeping separately.' That would be, presumably, because it is bog-standard university accommodation, and who would be among the first to complain if it wasn't for singles ...? Exactly, and all very tiresome, so do grow up, people.
    thearseblog 7:58a
    Wenger absolutely right to criticise Madrid and Co.

    In a summer when clubs and players have acted fairly appallingly to engineer transfers I find it rather heart-warming that we have a manager who not only doesn't engage in the same kind of tactics but who is brave enough to speak out against it.

    I know that after three years without a trophy and almost over a week without making a signing himself Arsene has his critics amongst Arsenal fans but to man Arsenal fans should be right behind him when he says that big clubs need to act better. He says:

    If you don't show respect to other clubs I think that football is moving in the wrong way. You cannot come out like Ramon Calderon has done at Real Madrid with Manchester United and tell them you cannot stop a player leaving.

    You can destabilise any player in the world — that is irresponsible. Big clubs should set an example.

    And it's not just Real Madrid, it's Barcelona that have done similar to Adebayor and Hleb while AC Milan used Vincenzo Morabito to mess with Adebayor's head. Now, I'm not foolish enough to think that Arsenal are whiter than white, but we do not engage in the same kind of media-led pursuits of players the way these clubs do.

    The way Madrid have acted this summer over Ronaldo has been dreadful. It's been so bad that as an Arsenal fan I have sympathy for Man United. Of course the clubs like Arsenal and United aren't helped by the players and their agents who lose sight of the fact that they're already earning a fortune and everything they do is motivated entirely by greed. It's a sad situation really but unfortunately I don't see it changing any time soon. 

    Wherever there is big money there are shysters and scum-sucking bottom-feeding cuntblisters like agents and an agent's job is to make his client money. It's not to say 'Well, you're actually earning good money here and for the sake of your football career I'd advise you to stay'. As long as agents are tolerated then things will never change. Ban all agents, that's what I say. If a player is too stupid to enter in wage negotiations, like every other person on the planet has to do themselves, then fuck them. 

    One man who has certainly had his head turned by agents is Emmanuel Adebayor. The Guardian reports that in discussions yesterday he refused to commit to Arsenal, holding out for three times his current £35,000 a week salary. If that's really the case then fuck him. Absolutely fuck him. I'm tired of shit like this, just because you've scored a few goals one season does not mean you're a fucking superstar.

    And to me it's obvious that Adebayor and his people have never been interested primarily in a wage rise at Arsenal. If he'd really wanted some more money they'd have gone and said 'Do you think that we could negotiate an improved contract for Adebayor based on his last season?' and there's every chance the club would have done that. When you walk in, just as the season is over, and blunderbuss a demand for £80,000+, knowing that the club has a wage structure, then it's just another way of making a transfer request. The worst thing is that no player will ever say they want to leave directly in case they lose their 'loyalty bonus' written into their contracts. Imagine. Loyalty bonus. It'd make you fucking cry.

    So Adebayor's objective was never to get more money from Arsenal. It was to get a move to Barcelona or AC Milan. If Arsenal had capitulated and given him the cash then he'd have stayed, I think, because he probably likes it at Arsenal. He's a big personality, well liked by the other players and the staff, so either way is win-win for him. Now though, with interest from other clubs having cooled, perhaps the cast-iron guarantees his agent got from them not so cast-iron after all, he's stuck in a kind of limbo.

    In one way I hope no move happens at all. It'd be sweet justice and hopefully it'd teach other players a valuable lesson. Watching Adebayor squirm as fans tell him what they think would be most enjoyable. On the other hand I'm loathe to keep someone who has acted in such a way and if the money came in and we had a decent replacement I'd flog him in a second. How he's fucked it up though. Well on his way to being a real fans favourite, still with work to do though, now he's just another cunt in a game full of them.

    Bacary Sagna talks about his return and says his ankle is improving all the time. It's good to see him back as we really missed him at the tail-end of the last season.

    The squad play a friendly against Hungarian side Szombathelyi this evening and the pre-season begins in earnest at the Austrian training camp. No doubt we'll get picture specials of them being put through their paces.

    Other than that it's all quiet so I'll leave it there. More tomorrow. 

    hnpcc
    5:15p
    New Look Time Magazine
    I really miss Get This.

    But fortunately the New Look Time Magazine sketch is up on YouTube.
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